Dr. Escabi: The nostalgia of the diaspora
Sitting on the “balcón" (what we call the porch in Puerto Rico) and talking to family members while the "coquí" (a tiny, yet loud frog) sings in the background. Enjoying the food we grew up with. Visiting the old stomping grounds and admiring how much things have changed, either for progress or dilapidation. Having flashbacks of all the happy and sad memories brought by sights, sounds and smells that we have had to leave behind. For many of us that have had to relocate, the rush of emotions that engulfs us can be overwhelming.
When faced with all that, I sometimes struggle to remember what would be so important to take me away from it. Then you sadly remember responsibilities and opportunities that keep you where you are and not where you would like to be; a rationalization to justify that difficult decision that in time gets harder to maintain. Now imagine this year not being able to enjoy even a little of where you left that piece of your heart because of trying to stay safe in these uncertain times; not wanting to risk self-exposure or spreading an unwelcomed microscopic assailant that may harm those you so desperately want to hug.
This holiday season, when you gather for Thanksgiving or decorate for Christmas, be sympathetic to those that have been transplanted around you. Please be kind and have a word of encouragement or gesture of friendship. It does not even have to be someone from another country. People from other states, or even from other towns, can feel it too. In fairness, even those that have lived in the same place all their lives may feel the world is unfamiliar to them because of departed loved ones or plain isolation during these hard COVID-19 times.
But do not get me wrong. It is not that we are not appreciative of the opportunities; at least, I know I am. I am also immensely grateful for how welcoming my community is and for dear friends that have embraced my family and me. If we were back in the place we now miss, we would likely be missing the place and people where we now are; a bittersweet irony for sure.
Being part of a diaspora, for most, is not easy. Many of us sacrificed the warmth of a home we always knew and the closeness to the people we hold dear to fight for a more prosperous future for the next generations.
If nothing else, during the coming holidays, look past your personal feelings on immigration or cultural sensitivities. Please understand that those of us that came here from a different country often have an undercurrent of emotions that you may not see and/or understand unless you have been out of your element for a prolonged period. Not understanding does not mean you cannot sympathize. Happy Thanksgiving! Merry Christmas! And may the new year bring all of you blessings and better times than we’ve all had recently.
